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The sin of non-believing

24/9/2013

13 Comments

 
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Shiva with his hair open; ready to receive the Bhagirathi that fell in from the heavens according to Hindu mythology
The darkness that we had all been waiting for, fell suddenly. With it came an uneasy calm. The pink and orange hues of the setting sun were no longer reflecting off the fast flowing waters of the Ganga, or Maa Ganga as they call her up in the hills. With its daytime sparkle gone; the river appeared dark and brooding as it lashed restlessly against the steps of the deserted ghat. The flower seller, sitting within a half circle of leaf cups filled with flowers and a diya (Rs 10 each); who had drawn me earlier with her gentle eyes and luminescent i’ve-found-god smile; had gone too. In the half hour wait for the arati, much had changed. The most ominous were the rain clouds that had silently crept across the sky, making it many shades darker than it usually is at 6.30 pm on a summer evening.

Saransh and I were in a group of devout waiting for the Ganga Aarti on Triveni ghat, Rishikesh. We were sitting on stone steps leading up from the river, waiting for the sun to set so that the diyas could be lit.  Around us were about 60 others – mostly families with folded hands - men with angochas hanging on their shoulders, women with sari pallus covering their heads, children with shiny eyes; and some white skinned foreigners in Om print kurtas, tilaks and chappals. Just as the priests started chanting mantras and lighting the large ceremonial brass lamps; the sky broke with a loud roar. A fierce downpour splattered over the shed; and outside, snuffing out not just the diyas but also the lights, it seemed. The river bank was plunged in pitch darkness.

Outside the shed, rain lashed the angry river. Inside, there was a rush of people pushing to get a roof over their heads. Saransh and I held hands tightly and just kept moving wherever the crowd shoved us. After a while there was stillness and a cold fear started putting its icy fingers on us. “Will the rain stop?” Saransh whispered fearfully. “Of course,” I whispered back, trying to sound confident. Many more minutes passed but the storm did not abate. I felt something wet licking my toes and realized that muddy water was now lapping our feet. In panic I turned to an old priest standing beside me. He smiled gently and said: "Dariye mat, yeh Ganga ka paani nahin hai, sadak se aa raha hai. Kuch nahi hoga”.  

Someone asked for kapur and the priest handed it over in the dark. There was the sound of a match being struck and a small flame leapt up. The lamps were being lit again.  The yellow glow started casting shadows around and someone started singing “Jai Gange mata”. Slowly, everyone had joined in. Saransh was standing with his palms together, eyes tightly shut, even as the rain sprayed us with errant drops and water engulfed our feet.  I tried to close my eyes too but after more than a decade of non believing it was impossible for me to convince myself that a god would save us. Around me there were faces that appeared calm and collected; unified by their divine faith. In my mind there was just a crass acceptance of human insignificance before the might of nature.

Atheism had come to me over a few years; science and Richard Dawkins having played a major role in the indoctrination. But I kept it to myself, preferring that Saransh form his own beliefs as he grew older. I remembered how some years back he had startled me by saying: I don’t think there is a god living in the sky, there are only planets there. I looked at him as he tried to mumble words from the arati he did not know. Some of his terrible fear was gone, if only for those moments. At that time he was a believer and it gave him strength when he needed it the most. I regretted I wasn't one because believers have advantages in life that non believers don’t.

Epilogue: You don't need to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out that the river did not breach its bank and we survived. When the rain stemmed a bit, we rushed into the darkness and clambered up the steps of the ghat where our autorickshaw driver was waiting for us faithfully, soaked to the skin but smilingly holding out a plastic bottle of Ganga water.  "Ghar mein rakhne se sab accha hota hai," he said, handing it over to me.

Dariye mat, yeh Ganga ka paani nahin hai, sadak se aa raha hai. Kuch nahi hoga: Don't be scared, the river has not breached its bank; Ghar mein rakhne se sab accha hota hai: all shall be well if you keep it in the house


The river Ganga is considered sacred by Hindus and worshipped as a goddess. It is believed that a dip in its waters can wash away your sins and grant you access to heaven. 
It is ranked as one of the five most polluted rivers in the world. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ganges
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The power of faith. Ganga arati at Rishikesh
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The angry river
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Arati and diyas in the water
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Pilgrim drying his dhoti on the river bank
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The flower seller with a I've-seen-god smile
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A riverside sage
13 Comments
pankaj munjal
23/9/2013 09:21:49 pm

Reading you is always a delightful experience. But this time, there was less of it ( I mean quantity), could write more...!?
Left me hungry for more !!

Reply
Mahendra
23/9/2013 11:04:26 pm

Nice pics, and the experience of being pelted by monsoon rains is a thrill in itself!

But I disagree with your meek "believers have advantages in life that non believers don’t". The two most powerful - and most manipulated emotions - are patriotism and religion. At least us non beleivers have narrowed this down to one (I believe this is also the reason China banned relegion - makes managing a large population simpler) or less. Thus believers have advantages like the ability to leap over a cliff with eyes closed - It may work out, and may even look magical - but perhaps one is better off not having to jump in the first place?

So dont be ashamed to admit your lack of belief. You control your destiny better than the believers.

(Incidentally I also did not pressurize Erika, and let her make her own choice - especially since Hitomi is a believer. But I admit I did feel that pang of thrill when Erika concluded that she was an agnostic....)

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Ritha
23/9/2013 11:39:13 pm

There are authors who force their opinions on others...and you are one such who is just telling what you feel, and I love you for that. I am on fence of believers and non-believers. Keep writing more. If you have gone to Rishikesh when it was crowded, then may be you could do an article with the comparison of then and now through your eyes.

Reply
ather
26/9/2013 02:04:23 am

Glad to have your writing and powerful images back in my life again- it whisked me away to India in an instant. What a wonderful first image- I showed everyone in the office! The descriptive writing at the start was as evocative as always and was most inspiring- loved the line 'with her gentle eyes and luminescent i’ve-found-god smile'. But it does all come to rather an abrupt end and it is as if the wonder of all that was around you clashed with world you believed in. For me, your ability to see the beauty of God's bounty and to describe it with such lucidity is faith enough.

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NOOPUR
26/9/2013 12:42:34 pm

I am among the non believers , who would stay miles away from the crowds at the ghat and the aarti ....though after reading your blog ,I am wondering.......... it might be interesting to go there ;) poor Saaransh !


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Prithvi
26/9/2013 08:20:56 pm

Nice and thought provoking. Loved the pics as well.

I feel that believing closes the doors for finding out. And therefore 'knowing'.I also think that non-believing is a variant of believing :) so what is there to 'know" ? that is a longer conversation ...

Reply
Y S Rawat
27/9/2013 02:16:39 pm

Good narration as usual, Rachna; my comlements. I am sure you liked the place and enjoyed your stay in 'Ganga Kinare'. Its nicely located resort over looking Ganga and Ghats accross the river, one can spend a lot of time leisurely enjoying the view.

There is a difference being a believer and those perform rituals. I am a fairly strong believer but not necesarily perform rituals except during an organised 'Puja' including in my own home that I am expected to attend. Banning religion, like in China as Mahendra says.does not mean all Chinese are non belivers. Faith or belief is some thing that comes from inside, it can neither be thrusted on a person nor can it be prevented, When the going is good, most people are (or so they feel) non believer, 'belief' surfaces with bad time. You may hear utterance like 'Oh God' or 'Hey Bhagwan', even from non believers not when the bad time falls on them but by merely seeing others suffering. Faith gives you peace and in bad times a lot of strength to face the suffering. You may recount your own reaction during recent 'Jal Pralaya in Kedarnath. Remeber the famous couplet of Kabir Das 'Dukh main sumerang sab karen, sukh main kare na koi, jo sukh main sumarin kare to dukh kahe ko hoy'.

Reply
Subodh
27/9/2013 03:11:24 pm

Rachna - I am no writer by any stretch of imagination but I feel writing on beliefs is really hard. Thanks for choosing the topic and you did very well. I think believers make stronger people. I am not referring to belief in religion or supernatural, but, just in believing. Believers make things happen. Something is to be said about influence of people around you, more believers around you the better it is. Whether kids make their own mind on beliefs, absolutely, but it is after observing the actions or lack there of from people around them. Personally, if I can instill a habit of believing, I will be overall a better and much healthier person.

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Babu
27/9/2013 08:00:36 pm

GOD, Is perhaps one of the biggest inventions of man. He has served us well over the ages. He has been the reasons for millions to die for many a great wars have been fought on the name of religion. He has served the few who preach on his name. But above all he has to a large extent brought sanity in our terrible society, for i think mankind is the worst of his creations. I think he is a necessary creation. We can do without him. We can do with him. BUT THERE IS A FORCE THAT GOVERNS THIS UNIVERSE. Couldn't meet u this time at Delhi. I spoke to Manoj. Thought u may drop in on 24th. Hope next time we meet.

Reply
Mahendra
1/10/2013 07:55:11 am

By the way, just to clarify - When I use the term "believer" I am referring to those who believe in the supernatural, including God. I am not against belief itself (Subodh please note, especially since I am turning up at your doorsteps in the next couple of days :-)), a person who does not believe in anything would actually be a very miserable person.

Reply
anjana link
7/10/2013 04:07:58 pm

Beautiful pics, Rachna. Likha achha hai but you don't have to be defensive . Even I can;t make head or tail of this dangerous shraddha. Keep us enlightened !!! Heres to more topical thought provoking views and news from you.

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Maitree
9/10/2013 08:44:02 pm

It was after a long I happened to read your earnestly composed belief. I remember the evening when we toppled down in gushing water near Laksar while returning from Delhi There is a Divine force, believe it or not--- depends on us.

Reply
BSV Babu
14/11/2013 02:07:54 pm

Good work Rachna. Keep it up.

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    Rachna Bisht Rawat is a full time mom and part time writer. She is married to an Army officer whose work takes the family to some of the most interesting corners of India.

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